First Entry!
I am not a master of words or wit and do not have great innate or learned writing abilities but I'm not exactly stupid either. What I AM is crazy. Not impaired, not challenged, not mentally ill, I am absolutely completely crazy and I love it. I would have it no other way, if I woke up tomorrow and I were normal I would probably have to kill myself because I have met some of these people that are supposedly 'normal' and it just makes me sick. It reminds me of a t-shirt I have, it says "I drink to make other people interesting” Same concept basically. These dull, boring 'normal' folks with no dreams and imaginations who do not hear voices in their head and have delusions of many a variety are just so foreign to me, I don't understand these people and I have no desire to ever become one of them. If you're crazy and you know it then your face will surely show it. I am crazy, and I am content and happy to be crazy and I wouldn't have it any other way. A couple of years into my one and only marriage my quite normal wife turned to me and said "honey, you add just the right amount of instability to my life." I was flattered it was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me in years later I have no t forgotten that statement or the impact that it has had upon me.
I'm just getting this started and I am not sure where it is going to go, but I thought it would be a good outlet for me and there might actually be some people out there that might actually find this interesting. I can go on and on and talking about this or that or what not forever and ever without ever ending. Sometimes my audience is bored to tears and on the verge of committing hari-kari like the old Japanese soldier on the plane in the movie Airplane, then off course there was the old lady who set herself on fire. It looks like I picked a bad day to quit sniffing glue.
So I will write as often and as much as possibly here and try to make it interesting enough so that you might be compelled to actually come back here and read what I have to say. Most of what I have to say is just useless and irrelevant but often times interesting. I don't care if you are laughing at me or with me, just as long as you are laughing. I could do something really normal and structured that everyone might expect by telling you all about me and who I am and what I've been through and what my childhood was like and I could tell you my reading on the Meyer Briggs or the MMPI, but that would be no fun. You get to figure it out as you go. I'm nuts. Bottom line and I intend to share my perspective of this backwards upside down inside out world that we live in. When I look around I often think that it's everyone else that is crazy and I am the one who is normal, though my psychiatrist vehemently disagrees with me. This is the same woman that thinks I'm manic all the time and wants to quadruple y dosage of this or that so I sleep 20 hours a day, she is slowly starting to see that my baseline is basically what other people consider manic and manic for me is on a whole nothing plane of existence. At the last appointment she asked if I was manic and I said 'god no, not even close, this isn't manic." She put her hand up on her hip and cocked her head like oprah used to do in the old days and said 'THIS is depressed?" Needless to say she sedated me yet more. I asked her that same day if I was going to live or die and she said probably a little bit of both, how diplomatic. More to share soon!
I'm just getting this started and I am not sure where it is going to go, but I thought it would be a good outlet for me and there might actually be some people out there that might actually find this interesting. I can go on and on and talking about this or that or what not forever and ever without ever ending. Sometimes my audience is bored to tears and on the verge of committing hari-kari like the old Japanese soldier on the plane in the movie Airplane, then off course there was the old lady who set herself on fire. It looks like I picked a bad day to quit sniffing glue.
So I will write as often and as much as possibly here and try to make it interesting enough so that you might be compelled to actually come back here and read what I have to say. Most of what I have to say is just useless and irrelevant but often times interesting. I don't care if you are laughing at me or with me, just as long as you are laughing. I could do something really normal and structured that everyone might expect by telling you all about me and who I am and what I've been through and what my childhood was like and I could tell you my reading on the Meyer Briggs or the MMPI, but that would be no fun. You get to figure it out as you go. I'm nuts. Bottom line and I intend to share my perspective of this backwards upside down inside out world that we live in. When I look around I often think that it's everyone else that is crazy and I am the one who is normal, though my psychiatrist vehemently disagrees with me. This is the same woman that thinks I'm manic all the time and wants to quadruple y dosage of this or that so I sleep 20 hours a day, she is slowly starting to see that my baseline is basically what other people consider manic and manic for me is on a whole nothing plane of existence. At the last appointment she asked if I was manic and I said 'god no, not even close, this isn't manic." She put her hand up on her hip and cocked her head like oprah used to do in the old days and said 'THIS is depressed?" Needless to say she sedated me yet more. I asked her that same day if I was going to live or die and she said probably a little bit of both, how diplomatic. More to share soon!
posted by Schizoid at 7:44 AM
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